I promised a seven year old girl
sixteen years would never happen
“don’t be afraid of driving, it will never happen”
in her rancor,
she pissed off a ten
year old girl’s
it was a hollow
the young early version
stepped into her
finding small doors
ready to explode.
She picks at
of her new tool.
That young one
at her pumpkin
her pumpkin legs,
digging her out…
I made a promise
to the little
sixteen would never come,
now here she is;
Great! I love this “finding small doors leading to
Thinned ice”. I’ve seen my children and grand
Children doing just this. As did I at one
time or another I s’pose.
you capture everything in this poem perfectly, I was particularly moved by the ending as this is how i feel a lot of the time, that I somehow managed to betray my younger self. The pain in this is intense and you manage to get it all down on paper so that when I read it I was reminded of what I did to the little girl I once was and how I too allowed myself to hurt her.
so,…i’m curious,…..was this your last night/late night time travel adventure???……i had thought that you might be writing last night……i could actually picturing this little boy that i used to know hangin out with her…..
Painfully sharp and effective.
Powerful poem and I can relate!
So well told. But so sad. You nailed it again.
excellent poem – I think it’s one of my favourites.
So perceptive. We relate. “…it was a hollow young thing but outlined in potential,,,”
I remember fearing becoming a teenager when i was younger so i feel i relate to this poem in a way. nearing the end of my teenage years, This poem sums up the pain and confusion that often comes with adolescence; Which to me is still very fresh in my mind being only 18. Thank you-this is now one of my new favourites of yours.
you’ve done it yet again; quietly lovely
This is amazing – really a punch to the gut. Great job!