The Child Within

I promised a seven year old girl
that
sixteen years would never happen

“don’t be afraid of driving, it will never happen”

in her rancor,
she pissed off a ten
year old girl’s
silhouette –
it was a hollow
young thing
but

outlined in
potential

the young early version
stepped into her
vacancy,
thickening
throughout
the
void
angry
silhouette,

she ripened

in body,
in vocabulary,
in age.

Sweet,
sultry,
sinister,
sixteen,
finding small doors
leading to
thinned
ice,

crystal air
loaded,
ready to explode.

She picks at
glass plank
floors, pulling
strips
of her new tool.

That young one
so afraid,
timid,
playing hide-and-seek
with her
developing
womanhood!

Enough!

She clutches
on to
her
shard sticks,

carving away
at her pumpkin
arms,
her pumpkin legs,
digging her out…

that little
phobic brat,
quivering around
her
prime
poisoned internals.

I made a promise
to the little
one,

sixteen would never come,

now here she is;
butchering
my promise
and
my child.

 

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12 thoughts on “The Child Within

  1. you capture everything in this poem perfectly, I was particularly moved by the ending as this is how i feel a lot of the time, that I somehow managed to betray my younger self. The pain in this is intense and you manage to get it all down on paper so that when I read it I was reminded of what I did to the little girl I once was and how I too allowed myself to hurt her.

  2. so,…i’m curious,…..was this your last night/late night time travel adventure???……i had thought that you might be writing last night……i could actually picturing this little boy that i used to know hangin out with her…..

  3. I remember fearing becoming a teenager when i was younger so i feel i relate to this poem in a way. nearing the end of my teenage years, This poem sums up the pain and confusion that often comes with adolescence; Which to me is still very fresh in my mind being only 18. Thank you-this is now one of my new favourites of yours.

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