Oh! Hands of agony.
Twisting life out of my inside’s.
While guilt gnaws on my heart,
my womb attacks itself.
An invasion!
Under the liquor, I know.
Stamped by a man’s life,
cut myself through the throat.
My own words, slicing
my flesh. Over and over
and over
again.
I despise June for all that it takes.
Keep it!
Keep it, I say!
I will keep words to myself.
Time will take sight,
sound,
hopefully, mind. And I can forget.
I can forget.
June,
avalanche came with hammers,
pounding cradle into coffin for me,
smashing off these fingers that wanted.
(St. Louis opens boiling arms
while I drag these
empty things.)
I searched through snowflakes
to learn how
to carry rubble,
I came too late!
It was next spring.
I fell!
Debris soaked
by snow melt,
carried down river,
handed over to desert land;
an arid cough.
Dry woman are vultures!
Using neck,
hair,
steeples,
as steps. A pyramid!
Waiting for their turn.
We reach
pyramid tops
with them, our own tears betraying us,
slipping our own steps.
We fall,
down,
down,
down,
bottomless!
Hopeless!
While dry woman take our
place
as Mother.
June 9.
A day that every other day
wants to be.
A day that wears snowball robes
among
daffodil trimmed
avenues,
singing a knot-tie
ditty that
clanks
with balls hooked
to short,
short
chains.
A day frosted with
pockets full
of posy,
cakes layered
with ashes
and
ashes,
dances,
twirls,
smiles,
until Bride and
groom
both fall
down.
6 years pester at them.
Knock, Knock, Knocking
on their skin, crawls
under epidermal
rugs
where it reaches up,
plucks at arm hair
follicles
one
by
one
creating a trail of annoyance
on
loving arms.
The pester years
crawl throughout
their underlying
crust,
burrowing themselves
deep
within,
until old Bride and
old Groom
fall down
in despair.
June 9 approaches.
A day that no other day wants
to be.
A day that wears soiled
tablecloths among
champagne
crashes,
singing a thunder
roar
lullaby to
heart shackles
that
clank, in pieces,
together.
A day full of
frozen hands stuffed
in pockets caked
with
ashes and ashes
of the past,
aches,
pains,
tears,
until Bride
and Groom
both fall down
in surrender.
maggiemaeijustsaythis 