I Was Born To A Gray World

I was born to a gray world.
Void of sunlight.
Barricaded by ice.
Hunters have come for me. I watched them
gobble up
sisters, a brother,
and the woman who birthed me.

I stayed, under rocks, under dirt,
for sixteen years. I washed myself
in sin,
couldn’t come clean.
Stained with nights that smothered me
in the devils
chest hairs.

My hair grew to the length of
a woman. Sweeping me
out from
the dirt, standing me on
one foot,
then two.

Then, my breasts grew,
not much larger,
but wiser!

For some time, I lived out
dull
nightmares.
Screaming in sleep.
Silent during the dull day.
Grinding coffee beans
with quiet grips of rage.

I sliced each strand of woman from
my head,
became a man. I cut tears out of my arms
till I forgot how to
cry,
smashed my head heavy till
I forgot
everything else…

except that the world is gray.

My hair has grown back out
to the size of a woman
and my breasts haven’t grown
anything but heavy,
in a heavy body,
in a heavy gray body.

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17 thoughts on “I Was Born To A Gray World

    1. Thank you for asking! That is very kind of you. I am definitely ok. Had a rough life. Lots of it. If I don’t write, I’ll lose my mind. But I am definitely ok! 🙂

      1. Well, I won’t say anything else but that your poems are strong, serious and filled with pain…I’ve been in that place, so if you need someone to talk to, I am a good listener and very intuitive. IM me. or otherwise.

  1. This consistently amazes me exactly how blog writers such as your self can find the time and the dedication to keep on composing good content. Your blog issuperb and one of my need to read blogs. I simply had to thank you.

  2. This poem is full of painful feelings and thoughts that many can relate to. Thank you for writing such a piece…it reminds us of the harsh reality and the “gray world” we live in.

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